It's been a very long time since I've written on this blog to you. I'm sorry about that. Life has up and run away with us since...well, YOU up and started running.
If there's one word I could use to describe you, it is "spirited." You are full of spirit.
Just about everything makes you giggle uncontrollably, especially when we tickle you right under your neck. You run everywhere you go, whether it's down the hall at home or down the aisles at Target away from Mommy and GiGi. I have to remind you often that we are inside, and screaming is reserved for outside. You love to play and explore and climb. You are busy from sun up to sun down, taking care of your babies and Mousey and cooking and reading and watching your favorite shows. You are friendly and bubbly and talk to just about everyone you come in contact with.
In fact, you talk all the time. You talk about what you see, what you're doing, what I'm doing, what Daddy is doing, what you think BanBen might be doing, what's on tv, what's not on tv...You never really STOP talking. I've even heard you talk in your sleep.
You may not look much like me, but your personality is SO. ME.
With our personality comes the not-so-fun side of being "spirited." It also means you are VERY strong-willed. We've always known this, even from your gender scan when I was 20 weeks pregnant with you - you sat backwards Indian style for over an hour while we poked and prodded you to move to find out who you were. You continued to show it with your stubbornness to sit up on your own, crawl, and walk, waiting until you were 17 months old to take off.
And then once you did, we can't stop you. You have very specific opinions about what you like and what you don't like. You also are on your own time frame. It's brought us both to tears on multiple occasions, leaving your poor Daddy, "Da-Da" you still call him, to pick up the pieces of us both. I hope he's prepared to do that for the rest of our combined lives.
But we're working on it. We've had to come up with a solution to you telling us "no" or not coming to us when we ask. Unfortunately, that solution is popping you on the leg gently, which really hurts your feelings more than anything. And we're working on being content in our surroundings. Just because you are through with your plate and cup doesn't mean you need to push it off the table. We go through a lot of marshmallows as rewards for things.
Like I said, we're working on it.
But we can't push you very hard. You have to decide on your own when you are ready for these things. Potty training has been pushed to the back burner because I know that forcing you to do it will more than likely backfire on us rather than be productive. You ask to potty occasionally, and sometimes you don't care at all.
We are learning to manipulate our schedules to allow you ample time to "take care of things" before we leave the house - tuck Mousey into bed with a sweet kiss, brush your hair without tears, let you tell us "no" to five different shirts before deciding which one you will wear.
We're trying to allow you to be YOU, without crushing that "spirit" that I love so much. That spirit will take you so very far.
The sweet side of your spirit has made you a favorite among your daycare teachers and friends. I love hearing how sweet you are at school and seeing you interact with your friends. They give you big hugs every morning and you play so kindly with them. Except when Mickey Mouse is involved, and then you had to go sit up front with the Director...
The playful side of your spirit has given you the ability to play independently without Mommy or Daddy right by your side. You love to play in your "big girl room" and are just fine to play in there for hours with me just checking on you every so often. You have a huge imagination and I often catch you chatting on your phone and going on trips to see family members within the confines of our home.
The adventurous side of your spirit lets us drop you off with extended family without fear of separation anxiety. You spend long weekends with GiGi, BanBen, and BeBe and PawPaw with no issues. You say, "Bye Mommy!" and that's all!
The smart side of your spirit makes you so inquisitive and has instilled a love for learning. You ask so many questions and want to know what we are all doing at all times. You love to watch me put on my make-up and ask what each thing is for, before asking for some of your own. You love to read books and ask what the pictures are about. You also love your Bible stories, and learning parts of the stories so that we can quiz you about them. You know all about Jonah and his whale, Noah and his animals, and Joshua blowing his trumpets, but you get a little confused on whether it was David or Daniel who was in the lions' den.
The tender side of your spirit has feelings that are hurt very easily, even by harmless lady bugs. I have to give you many hugs and kisses because you bumped your elbow, Goofy fell off his bike, or Charlotte's tail popped you on the leg.
There are so many other precious parts of you that I could go on and on all day about. I love every bit of you - even the trying and frustrating bits. I know that those are actually more few and far between than I realize.
And I guess that's what terrifies me most about this next step in our family life - You are going to be a big sister.
And when I say that, I mean, fairly quickly. I'm 36 weeks pregnant tomorrow.
When people have asked if you have figured out that things are going to change, I tell them honestly that you have no idea and we are going to rock your world.
Because we are. I'm not worried about me or Daddy. I know that you don't split love between two children - instead your love doubles. I already love your Little Brother in ways I never thought possible, and I've never met him.
It's YOU I worry about, and how these big changes will affect your spirit. I don't want to lose an ounce of anything I have described about you. I need that spirit to keep us all going as we transition into a family of four. I need to know that you're going to be ok.
Your GiGi assures me that you'll be just fine. But I know how much you love snuggle times in Mommy and Daddy's bed in the morning, spreading Pop Tart crumbs across our sheets while we watch the Today Show. I know how you love to run down the hall yelling incoherent sounds. I know how you love to leave your toys all over the floors because we all ignore them until it's time to clean up. I know how you love spending time with Your Gigi on "Gigi Days."
Every aspect of our lives is going to change with bringing home Little Brother. You are going to have to share toys and food and Mommy's lap. You are going to have to be quiet when you don't want to. And you're going to have to be someone's Big Sister forever.
Heck, you're even going to have to share this blog.
I hope you realize how much of a blessing and a gift a sibling is early on in life. I didn't realize it until MUCH later. I am so thankful for my brother and all he provided me with growing up - good and bad.
I know that you and JP will be big buddies and you will love to have a playmate around. You two will get in lots of trouble together. But you will always have another person in the family to rely on. A special relationship with secrets from Mom and Dad that you will keep for years to come. You will make sure you are the only one who is allowed to push him around, and threaten to beat up any bullies who mess with him. You will ignore him in the lunchroom, but be so proud of his accomplishments. You will complain about attending his sporting events, but be upset when he can't be at yours.
There's nothing like a sibling relationship. I'm so glad we get the chance to give it to you.
And through all of it, I am going to do my very best to make sure we don't dim the light of your spirit. To give you all the praise and adoration that we absolutely can so that you know you are special because you are who you are. JPs spirit is going to be so much different than yours. Both of you are perfectly made and formed by a God who gives us each different personalities and skills and talents. You are both unique.
I love who you are now. I can't wait to see who you are as a Big Sister. I can't wait to meet your Little Brother. I can't wait to see what our new family dynamic will be like. I can't wait to fall in love with Your Daddy all over again.
I love you more than ever, my Sweet, Sweet Girl.
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